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Tuesday, August 30, 2005

EDITED VERSION

Chitter Chatter

Currently thinking about Sadism Masochism. I have no idea why but these have been my latest craze's. I've been so inlove with Philia's and Biographies of odd people (P Diana, Count Dracul, Adolf Hitler, etc.) This here is the effect of having Ate Blu as my sister. :D

I always have fun talking to my buddies! WDL, TG, ADS, NS, RO, RV, NC, I so had the best time talking to you guys. Funny how the most senseless conversations are usually the one's worth remembering (:

Oh and thank you also to RL & JJ who gave me the most genuine laugh I've had in ages! You guys make me smile - truly.

Guess what? Ranz came all out with me, he truly is madly and deeply inlove with Reena. Aw, such a sweet couple (; You guys are the one to envy, you're undeniably perfect for each other <3 Beautiful how you guys have so much love to give, and you give it to each other. MAN, I'm such a romantic, I can feel my heart swollen up.

Xaverians are LUCKY, do you know why? Because after getting a 4-day weekend, they're gonna get a 3-day weekend; that's right, they have no classes on Friday. Sheesh. But it's alright, because it's card week for them. Aww, you guys are so gonna get in for.

On a lighter note, the Swap Meet is tomorrow! Wee, so fun. I don't know why, but I always enjoy our annual Swap Meet. Maybe I like it because I like interacting with people - or maybe because it's a free cut. Yeah, as much as I want to say it's because of my first reason, it's not; it's because it's a free cut. Oh silly me.

Them Xaverians are asking if we want to go out on Friday. But I have cheering practice! Now shall I cut cheering? or shall I pass up an oppurtunity to nag them weirdos once more? I think I'll go with the latter. I'm sorry, best.

Some information I got from my sister's blog. Oh how totally cool :D

1.Mosquito repellents don't repel. They hide you. The spray blocks the mosquito's sensors so they don't know you're there.
2.Dentists have recommended that a toothbrush be kept at least 6 feet away from a toilet to avoid airborne particles resultingfrom the flush.
3.No piece of paper can be folded in half more than 7 times.
4.Donkeys kill more people annually than plane crashes.
5.You burn more calories sleeping than you do watching television.
6.Oak trees do not produce acorns until they are fifty years of age or older.
7.The king of hearts is the only king without a mustache.
8.American Airlines saved $40,000 in 1987 by eliminating 1 olive from each salad served in first-class.
9.Venus is the only planet that rotates clockwise.
10.Apples, not caffeine, are more efficient at waking you up in the morning.
11.The plastic things on the end of shoelaces are called aglets.
12.Most dust particles in your house are made from dead skin.
13.The first owner of the Marlboro Company died of lung cancer.
14.Michael Jordan makes more money from Nike annually than all of the Nike factory workers in Malaysia combined.
15.Marilyn Monroe had six toes.
16.All US Presidents have worn glasses. Some just didn't like being seen wearing them in public.
17.Walter Disney was afraid of mice.
18.Pearls melt in vinegar.
19.The three most valuable brand names on earth: Marlboro, Coca-Cola,and Budweiser, in that order.
20.It is possible to lead a cow upstairs...but not downstairs.
21.A duck's quack doesn't echo and no one knows why.
22.The reason firehouses have circular stairways is from the days when the engines were pulled by horses. The horses were stabled on the ground floor and figured out how to walk up straight staircases.
23.Turtles can breathe through their butts
24.Butterflies taste with their feet.
25.On average, 100 people choke to death on ball-point pens every year.
26.On average people fear spiders more than they do death.
27.Ninety percent of New York City cabbies are recently arrived immigrants.
28Elephants are the only animals that can't jump.
29.Women blink nearly twice as much as men.
30.It's physically impossible for you to lick your elbow.
31.No word in the English language rhymes with "MONTH."
Our eyes are always the same size from birth, but our nose and ears never stop growing.
32.The electric chair was invented by a dentist.
33.All polar bears are left handed.
34.An ostrich's eye is bigger than its brain.
35.TYPEWRITER is the longest word that can be made using the letters only on one row of the keyboard.
36. "Go," is the shortest complete sentence in the English language.
37.A crocodile cannot stick its tongue out.
38.The cigarette lighter was invented before the match.
39.Almost everyone who reads this email will try to lick their elbow.

So you thought you knew, eh? Now you do! (:

I'm back and publishing this final draft. You'll know anyways if it's published, I'm a wordy person. I don't get straight to the point, there is always a point of reference; I always have to elaborate. I think it's a sickness.

ELEVEN MINUTES IS SUCH A GOOD BOOK :D but I like The Rule of Four better <3

moi, to that. Kinakagulyow na books (did i use that correctly, sis?)

Monday, August 29, 2005

Lights will guide you home, and ignite your bones, and I will try to fix you

Loves it. (I'm sorry to have been a victim of the contasgious "Loves it" started by Nicole Ritchie; yes, not Paris Hilton)

You all know how much I love The OC, right? but, despite my love for the show (seth&sumer), I still ge ticked everytime they show Marissa's (Micha Barton) face on tv (maybe it's because I think she's UGLY and the fact that she's filming a movie with my Hayden Christensen just makes me hate her even more). And plus, I also hate the fact that a lot of the good songs get played only when Ryan and Marissa are witnessing something terrible. MAAAN, does everything have to center around those two doofus'? Whatever - I don't know.

I have no idea why, but I'm more inlove with the comic reliefs and the sidekicks in these kinds of shows and films. Peyton (although some say she's the lead; I think she was in the first season and then it became Brooke during the second season) and Nathan; Seth and Summer; Missy in Bring it On; etc. Maybe cause when you're the lead, there's too much ego.

Moving on, Cheering Practice with my girls is always good :D

Have you ever gone through something that you never really were supposed to? Like somehow, in some twisted way, you got tangled up in a spider web that's beyond your reach? Well, I got into something similar to that a few days ago. And just moments ago, we had to face the consequences. As you all probably know, my bestfriend, and myself, along with everyone else in our posse` are the batch leaders for the "Sophomores". We handle everything, and, not to be boastful, we do our job quite well. For example, last year, we, freshmen then, won 2nd place at the Cheering Competition for our Intramurals, and often, a student from our batch represents the entire school. But what happens when friendship and extra-curricular activites collide? What happens when they get messed up?

You see, as Cheerleaders, we need to think of what's best for the squad. We should never ever put anyone on the squad just because they're our friends - and we did just that. But once we saw how hard she was pulling us down, we decided to straighten the rules out and become more strict. We removed all of the new cheerdancers and only accepted 3 - not including our friend. At first, we didn't know how to tell her because that certain friend has a attitude problem. I mean seriously, she really has an anger problem. It was really very difficult to say no to her. But we had to do it sometime, right? And the sooner, the better. Because if we prolonged the wait of telling her, we were lying to her as well.

So we called her up after cheering practice, we talked to her. She said it was ok, but on the other hand, she always says it's okay and when you turn your back, she'll put a knife in it. RIGHT DOWN THE BACK. And she'll do it repeatedly just to make sure that the throbbing pain is wild and intoxicating. She stabs you to death.

Now, we don't know how to act with her. Can anybody offer advice? I need a hug.

Jhay-be, I love you dear. We all do - really. Don't take it against us, alright? we can't handle that - we just can't. You have that effect on us.

**

By the way, there's an essa in the tagboard that's not me. You'll know it isn't me anyways because of my trademark smiley. (I posted as the last two "essas")

EHEM, new word I got from Dino Pastrano, KINAKAGULYOOOOWW :D

Friday, August 26, 2005

First and foremost, Happy Birthday to Jon Javellana :D (His birthday is tomorrow, Saturday, 27 Aug.)

I used to carry the weight of the world and now all I wanna do is spread my wings and fly.

- can't exactly say that yet, although I must admit, I am dying to.

Happy birthday, Jon. Happy Birthday, Jon. Happy birthday, happy birthday, happy birthday Jon! Thank you, Jon & Jules, Carlo & Anton, and 2-A-ers for the interestingly fun day today. I owe you guys a shitload.

Today, We only had 2 classes (well, with teachers present, that is!). It was F-U-N-K-I-N-K -F-U-N-K. Of course, just because there were no teachers present didn't mean that we'd create a commotion. I, being the bitch of a mayor that I am (and apparently, it's effective), will not allow such disgrace to befall our class. After saying our graces and discussing the headlines of the news, RN, our Math and next period teacher for that time, came inside the classroom to give us a quiz. Lo and behold, I got a passing grade! Anyways, moving on, After Math was History (where by the way, our cool teacher, BD, was wearing a GORGEOUS POLO from GAP; it said "Funk, All stars" at the back and "Legendary" in front. Now how super cool is that? And a SUPER COOL WRIST BAND HE GOT IN MALATE - yes, I asked were he got it). For history, we had a drill sheet where everyone OBVIOUSLY cheated - tip given by the Vice mayor, my Muder, ADS; she screamed "MU, answer sa number 5 Hsiao Ping! Yun nakasulat sa paper ni Nika!" in front of our professor and the whole 2-A. BD, simply said "PALAKPAK. ANG GALING NI ADS". Ha, ha! He obviously remembers what it's like to be in High. (:

After History Class, there were no teachers for the rest of the day! Of course, we were given a shitload of seatworks to do, but hey! We finished it in a flash, anyways. I ruled with a iron fist during the later periods of class but during the last few minutes, I loosened a LOT. By the last 5 minutes of class (after evaluation) everyone was JAMMING! Yes, we love to do that. Music is the highest art form - if you ask 2-A.

After classes, MC, HC, MDG, CG, CS, NC, ADS, DA, and I went to MC's loft. We got cleaned up and left all of our school bags there and headed to Promenade! Ah, our humble abode. We had our usual routine; mud slides, cappuccino's, light food, etc, etc. Then had our photographs taken for our class scrap book. After about an hour, JJ followed. Oh and before I forget, ADS likes CT who likes me. Oh what a mess this is! MAN, I'm not interested. Anyways, ADS, was being fucking desperate awhile ago since she was snogging a bunch of guys for 500 pesos. That's basically being a "Prostitute", right? I mean, if I didn't understand ADS, I'd be ashamed of her. I'd be ashamed of being her friend, but since I can grow past that, I'm gonna let it slip.

Moving on, JY followed at around 4:30post and we ate at CPK (Ohyeah, Califrnia Pizza Kitchen is the shit). After spiking our drinks, thanks to me (I was the only one they sold liquor to! They didn't believe that MDG, and even NC were old enough to drink. Ha, ha. In a way, I got insulted. Was she saying that I looked old? Oh screw her, mother fucker), we lit some cigs up and once again filled our lungs with useless smoke - which we like to call our "Stress Reliever". Obviously, not the whole company we were with knew that the majority of us smoked, so a lot of shocked faces emerged from those wasted, drunken faces. It was actually pretty funny, since we all hated each other at first, and now, we're thick as thieves. A perfect example of the saying "First Impressions NEVER last" - Kudos to that.

At around 6, our phones started to ring non-stop. The cheerleaders were furious we weren't at practice and training yet - oh screw this. So we immediately rushed to Eisenhower to see them practicing the resurrection and the basket toss, how inspiring (sarcastic!). When we realized we weren't needed, we invited JJ and MDG to come and watch practice. When they finally arrived, we ended up smoking once more and buying vodka. After purchasing our much needed, JJ, MC, CS, and I headed up to MC's loft where JY followed minutes after. We had a couple of poisoning of lungs and yummy shots when my brother said he's going to pick me up since I needed to accompany my sister and her friend in Metrowalk.

After many Goodbyes, I finally got up off of my Lazy and lethargic ass and headed home with brother dearest where CC and BT hitched a ride with us. We dropped them off at Promenade then headed home so that I could change (I stunk of Cheerleaders' sweat, Nicotine, and Alcohol - not the best combo in the world). When I got home, I immediately changed and headed to Metrowalk with sister dearest and MS, an old old old old old friend (: In metrowalk, we saw Willy (Yes, Jeanette's Willy; the one with the really weird hair before), who is expecting his first child with his girlfriend(?) of the moment.

After doing the usual in Metrowalk, we decided that we no longer have anything left to do there so we should just admit the fact that we're all getting old and losers and go home - we did. (OH, 11:11 RIGHT NOW! MAKE A WISH! :p)

Now, here I am, still in the clothes I wore in metrowalk, infront of the Damn PC, blogging about a day that will soon be long forgotten. Oh, what has the world become?

Photos to be uploaded soon, I'm too fucking lazy to upload. MM. Also soon to come, is random photos from cheering practice, outings, etc.

**

By the way, to my readers, if you want to know what is happening with the Male Juniors & Male Seniors and the Female Juniors & Female Sophomores, you go to a fucking gossip mill. You won't hear it from me (: It's confidential.

I think - or if not, HOPE - that Blanche and I have settled everything, right? Blanche is sweet. I like her (:

Though I will give my honest opinion: You guys are too SHALLOW it's ridiculous. MAHIYA NAMAN KAYO. ha, ha, ha, ha, ha.

Pero PUNYETA JAMVEE, INAAAAAA MO, AKALA MO ANG GALING GALING MO. BATUHIN KAYA KITA NG DICTIONARY SA MUKHA? GAGA. TSAKA YANG MATA MONG MALAKI, HAH. BAKA TUSUKIN KO YAN NG FORK MAG DAHAN DAHAN KA DYAN.

Thank you (:

Tuesday, August 23, 2005

I once watched a movie that had the theme "The Greatest thing one can ever learn is just to love and be loved in return" Moulin Rouge - a movie that impressed a lot of people. I could say that for awhile, I believed that that was the greatest thing - until I met B - no, this is not a shortcut for Baby. After meeting this person, certain events that followed have compelled me to ponder on things that are happening in my life right now. Both good and bad. I've come to realize that the greatest thing is not to love and be loved in return but instead, it is to love and not get anything in return. Do I sound like a martyr? Well, if that is true, then so be it - I am a martyr.

This morning, I wasn't able to talk to a peron dear to me after a series of days that we talked. I couldn't stay put. I felt incomplete. That's when I realized I already missed him. We talked the night before, and the days previous of that, yet I missed him unconditionally. I missed the way his eyebrows frow everytime he hears an unusual thing. I missed the way his laugh was so contagious. It was the laughter that kept me alive & happy. I missed the way we're so alike yet so different. I missed the way I'm so comfortable with him and vice versa. But most of all, I just missed being able to see him. But you know what, I can't demand that I get to spend every waking moment with B. I know that.

And I also know that when the time comes... when he finds his special someone; when he no longer needs his "meantime girl", I'm going to have to let go. Somebody else will get to see his "little mannerisms". And somebody else will hear his contagious laugh and laugh with him. That will be a hard transition for me, it will. But none the less, I will let go. For a person in love will always think of her significant other first. And that's what I am - a person in love.

"The greatest thing one can ever learn is just to love and be loved in return" - I beg to differ! "The greatest thing one could ever learn is to love without expecting anything in return." That's better....

Adios, readers!

Saturday, August 20, 2005

Mistakes should only hurt those who make them. Not others. That is, by far, the worst of all mistakes.

I'm sorry I hurt you, I didn't mean to. If I had known that I had that much effect on you - or other people, I would have probably ignored and thrown it. A friendship is now ruined on my behalf. Something so beautiful has been marred and lost to destruction and corruption because of MY mistake. How naive of me. How stupid of me. Slash my wrists now, please.

Never again.

I want you to forgive me, but I don't deserve it. I want to make things better and ok, but I know I can't. I want to go back to the way things were, but I know I shouldn't. I want to take everything back, but I know that it's not possible.

It's all up to you know.

EDITED ON AUGUST. 22

Deuce Bigalow: European Gigolow was so gross. HAHA, pigsty :P

TITO VIC IS GOING TO GIVE ME A POSTER OF COLUMBIA - a poster that is a collage of all the "Golden Globe: Best Movie of the Year Award" for a decade (:

Can you say HELL YEAH? I'll post a photo of it soon ;p

Tuesday, August 16, 2005

The History exam this morning killed me. Screw you, BD. (;

Somebody resuscitate me now. Yay!

I'm loving my new Mr. A-Z cd. It certainly has a new twist to it. In a way, it's still the old Jason Mraz we all know and love, with a twist of new flavor. Just the way I like it. Looks like he's going to beat the sophomore slump after all.

Me, like.

By the way, Ivy rocks hardest since she scored a hott photograph of a certain JAB.

Moving on, I went online to blog about the most bittersweet memories I possess.

Have you ever been beside the person you ~~adored~~ loved who you know, in a million years, could and would never reciprocate the feelings you have for them? That is, by far, one of the most painful things one can ever experience.

This year, I wished for contentment. To be happy whether or not the person I want to grow old with will finally coincide with me. I guess in a way, love found it's way back to me. Because once more, here I am, crying my heart out in oblivion. But I no longer want to "kiss a bunch of morons" while waiting for that one special person who'll wake up a heart long afraid to feel; who'll rekindle every dying and dead part of me; who'll purify my heart. No, I won't. Why waste my time?

All of this bitterness was probably caused by my past pain. I've been played, I've been taken for granted, I've been used, whatever. I remember those days... I wanted to kill myself, but I needed to show you that I could move on. I wanted to scream at you, but my respect for you got in the way. I wanted to turn the cheek, but I didn't want to run away. I wanted to loose my mind - which, in a way, I did, but my pride was too high. I wanted to stop writing, but it was the only thing I could confide in. I wanted to leave, but I loved you too much.

Now can you seriously telling me I'm being paranoid? Where do you think I got my url, you silly billy.

My heart is still bruised, broken, torn, and a little shattered from the last uncontented heart it had collided with. Heart on Collision. Great Impact.

Please, if by any fate, I do decide to give my heart to you, be careful with it, it's fragile.

They say that in a relationship there's always someone who loves more...

OH GOD, I HOPE IT ISN'T ME.

I'm looking for love this time sounding hopeful but it's making me cry.
-Mr. Curiosity, Jason Mraz

Wednesday, August 10, 2005

As I sit here in front of my Personal Computer, with thoughts swirling about on my brain yet with no way to deliver and articulate, I decided to post my Aunt's speech during my Grandfather's final mass.

"Because we are also what we have lost" (Amores Perros (2000) directed by Alejandro Gonzalez Inarritu)

Being the eldest of eight, I was tasked to deliver a short message today, the operative word being "short." Indeed, to have even nine out of the 40 plus family members here speak - Mama, eight children and their partners, 21 grandchildren, two with spouses, and one great grandchild - Papa would rise from his coffin and say "Tama na ang maraming satsat." My role therefore this morning is just to weave all their memories together into a word tapestry, to remember Papa by, and to thank you all before he goes to his final rest.

Remembrances first: His children have variations on one theme in their memory of Papa: he was "strict." No denying it; he was a stern disciplinarian, a stickler for rules, a patriarch circa Old Testament, or at least circa pre-war Philippines. He always had the last say in everything in the family. Whether it was a raise in allowance or attendance in a party, Mama always said, "ask your Papa," and we had to bow to his word.

But his strictness bore no malice or ill will. He believed what he was doing or saying or scolding us about was for our protection, our own good. And as son-in-law Alex put it, he did have a soft spot but had a different way of showing he cared, hindi malambot, and was therefore sometimes misunderstood. Perhaps that was because of the way he was brought up himself, for his own father ruled with an iron hand. Perhaps it was also what fathers were expected to be then, good providers, but also silent, strict, unsentimental, and strong, dispensing a tough love. Perhaps it had to do with his traumatic experiences as a soldier in World War II, where we only belatedly found out, he had saved lives and won a medal of valor, I don't know.

Nevertheless, the standards he expected others to follow, he exacted from himself. He was as strict and disciplined with himself as he was with his children and employees. Far from being born with a silver spoon in his mouth, (in other words, poor and proud of it), he was a self-made, hardworking man. He had a stressful job at his officer, the International Correspondence Schools; yet after work, he could still pitch in at home, repairing the roof, wielding the walis tinting or garden shears, cleaning the car, etc. He even did his own laundry and ironing. Who among the liberated or macho men here do that, I wonder?

Coupled with his strictness was his courage, even fearlessness. My Brother remembers him as invulnerable, a superman. He vent his ire, not caring who or what you were: anyone who did shoddy work, a gun-toting policeman, drivers who cut into his path on the road, or istambays who dared whistle at his young daughters. And as Mama commented at his deathbed, "simaron pa rin ang Papa ninyo hanggang huli," for he raged against old age, a series of strokes, and the irrevocable dying of the light.

Yet it is amusing to know that his grandchildren belie his children's and wife's picture of this strict disciplinarian, this simaron. Often warned by their parents to behave so as not to anger their Lolo, the grandchildren's variations on a theme about their grandfather revolve not on the words "strict" and "disciplinarian" but on the words "funny" and "laugh"! In fact, Huey finds it "pretty hard to believe that he was strict, for he showed a smile every time." Lorie concurs, saying beneath the bluster, he was always ready to laugh and wishes she could hear once again his emphatic "Tang 'na!" when he hears these mushy messages. Jap, perhaps like all the rest, remembers being patiently taught to say that very same Pinoy epithet and being made to sip some beer at the age of 2. Kara and Dani remember how, instead of scolding them after breaking a pot and a wine bottle respectively, he laughed and said it was no big deal. Drei remembers him teaching her to live the way he thought we ought to live; Ida remembers him from his floater and sinker jokes, a kind of humor he unfortunately passed on to some of us (never mind what that's about). Mai remembers him reading a newspaper alone in his favorite Shangri-La; Jill remembers him sitting on a rocking chair, looking intimidating but respectable. Our Singaporeans, Pocholo, Issa, and Manolo found him to be always happy, nice, very active, and funny, making jokes about Singaporean dollars and pesos. He had pet names for some, tofu boy for Huey, Barang for Alessa, and at least two of the more gregarious girls were called Taratitat. Drop appreciates his Lolo who forgot people after his stroke but still remembered his name. Sancho, Chico, Vito, Maxine, Shea and the littlest ones Joaquin and Ally remember the pats on the head, how he laughed, or how he made them laugh and how he took care of them, while youngest grandchild Mickey patted his arm when he was sick, boasting all the while to her father Mike that she was taking care of his father.

Not having grown up with him, his sons and daughters-in-law also have a different take on Papa. My Sol notes how he kept the family together and prepared for their future; Grace's Alex saw his practicality; Surie's Andre, his discipline; Laly's Ketch, his fairness; Gino's Al, his ready smile; Joey's Grace, his dignity and strength as head of the family; and Mike's Rara, who met him only in his very senior years, his childlike innocence - not quite the same picture of the autocrat his own children tend to remember. Perhaps, Vikki's Leo sums it all up for them by saying, in his characteristic Leo Mauricio way, that Papa was his favorite father-in-law.

There is much more that could be said about Papa - his exploits during the war; his work as lawyer and as General Manager of the ICS; his two terms in office as kagawad in Barangay Kapitolyo, Pasig; his work as lay minister. But I will not go into that, again mindful of his "tama na ang satsat."

Instead, I would like to wind down what I had promised would be a short thank you message. First of all, we thank the Lord for making Papa Mama's spouse and thereby producing this big rambunctious noisy heavy eaters of a family of ours. We thank Papa for making us proud that he was one of those who defended the country during the war, and for his forward thinking in the field of Philippine education as a pioneer in distance learning. We thank him, and Mama, for transforming his lifelong job into a modest family business - something that has survived the economic crises that have plagued this country. This business keeps the family bonded, provides some of us with a livelihood and others with a little extra for our needs. We thank him for this legacy, not cash or property, but the means and tools and capacity to work for it in the spirit of not giving us fish but teaching us how to fish. We thank him most of all for his legacy of struggle, hard work, discipline, courage, strength, and stability - we hope we have inherited some of that and can in turn pass them on to our children. Finally, to echo my husband Sol, we thank him for keeping us all together through the inevitable trials and rough spots, an unbroken family in a broken world.

On behalf of the Martinez family, including his surviving brothers Tatay Delfo and Tito Turing and his wife Claire, our cousins, nephews and nieces, I would like to thank you all for being with us in this last despedida for him. While we mourn his loss, we also celebrate his bienvenida in the next life, where he rejoins his parents, sister, two brothers, and His Creator. We celebrate because we know he is not lost to us, for he lives in all 40 something of us, and in all of you whose lives he has touched, "Because, indeed, we are also what we have lost."

Maraming Salamat po sa inyong lahat. Dios po an mabalos sa saindong gabos.
-Paz Verdadez "Doodie" Martinez Santos

Now wasn't that the most beautiful speech ever? Yes, love for English and love for writing runs in the Martinez genes; it's one GOOD legacy.

I'm being such a drag. My mind hurts. High school hates my ass; drama seems to think I'm adorable, otherwise, why wouldn't it stop CHASING me? Thank God I opened my blog once more. It seriously feels like I'm reuniting with an old buddy of mine.

Although, I must say, it has been through hell and back with me. It is the key to all of my memories - both glee & pain. I mean, do I really want to keep a reminder of everything you people made me go through? It seriously feels like the pangs of hurt are immersing it's self deeper in my skin. But on the other hand, it's as if this blog is my best friend. It's the ONE key to my heart. The one thing that can either break me or make me, I just hope it's the latter.

In this kind of world, no one deserves to die. But on the other hand, we never really deserved to live anyways. We're just random souls some lunatic picked out of a box. I'm expanding my horizons, go and let me be.

Oh bestest friends, I just want to thank you for putting up with my very extreme mood swings. I know that we never really were fated to be together... We just happened to be people who coincided with each other.

Could you guys actually be my doppelganger? Hm, Aristotle once said, A friend is a single soul dwelling in two bodies.

I need to get some sleep. When INSOMNIA attacks. I'm toxic. I'm contagious - stay away.

CLASSMASTES have been calling me "WASTED DUCHESS" which in tagalog is "SABOG na DUKESA"

Ok, classmates, I love you and all but... INA NYO. Ha, ha. POTAH.

SOMEBODY DENUDE ME.

**

edited on August 14

Just got home from Shang :D

By the way, don't watch dark waters. It's not a good movie. At first, it's sort of like Hide and Seek, but then it gets really.. uhrm. The Longest Yard was GOOOOOOOOOOD. ahh, I love adam sandler XD

Ate Jae, Kuya Jap, and I went to Shang at 4 in the afternoon and ate at WHAM. pota, I love that place. haha. After which, we catched up with daddy and watched Dark Waters and The Longest Yard in Columbia, which's office is now at Shang. AYOS. We're watching Deuce Bigalow: European Gigolow next sunday (: WWEEEE. I love being the niece of the owner of Columbia and Buena Vista here in the Philippines; we have a private, and not to mention advance, viewing and a private and secluded theatre OH, THE PERKS.

Pictures are now up in my multiply. (from the sta. cruzan, ate blu's birthday, et cetera.)

The Chronicles of Narnia is going to be released by Columbia/Buene Vista on Jan. 8. We're watching it on October? WEE.

And oh yeah, ate jae and I raided tower records and the pirated dvd stands of metrowalk yesterday. I wasted 1000 and Ate Jae wasted the same amount. We also raided Powerbooks and spent 1000, too. CAN YOU SAY LIKE HELL?

Loving it.

Monday, August 08, 2005

I just can't keep away from writing - and this blog.

This blog is up and running once more. Yes, like a child, I just can't stay put (: Of course, I'll be blogging less and my posts and entries will no longer be non-sensical.

My grandfather passed last friday and I just wanted to thank everybody who prayed for him. Jake, partner, thanks for comforting me. You've been great! Halafyu.

Anyways, I've been in his wake everyday since friday and I literally haven't slept. My eyes hurt.

Let me blog back later.