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Alessandra
Essa.Les.
Apathetic (in a way). Insomniac. Fascinated by brujeria. Epitomizes procrastination. Hopes for the best, expects the worst. Cynical. Empathetic. Introvert. Obstructionist. Inconspicuous. Imaginative. Ambiguous. Passive-Aggressive.


Melancholic. Pessimist. Eloquent. Critical. Dense. Euphuist. Loquacious. Pompous. Shrewd. Walking Paradox.

The world is full of obvious things which nobody by any chance ever observes.
- The Curious Incident of the dog in the night-time, Mark Haddon (Christopher)

**
When it comes down to it,
I let them think what they want.
If they care enough to bother with what I do,
then I'm already better than them anyways.
- Marilyn Monroe

**
I was born with an enormous need for affection, and a terrible need to give it.
- Audrey Hepburn

**
The pure and simple truth is rarely pure and never simple.
- Oscar Wilde

**
I do not want people to be very agreeable, as it saves me the trouble of liking them a great deal.
- Jane Austen

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Fresh new links :D mike yap, lexa lim, iana bantug, Lisa encarnacion, kuya takeshit (: and frank magalona

***

I just got home from the 2004, O.B. Montessori Sing-out. The sing-out this year was... er, so-so. The other branches were bitching on Greenhills. Most particularly, The Jazz Dance Club. In all fairness, I agree with them; They did look...uh...Quite disturbing. Forget the fact that one of my bestfriends performed there.

We all got punished again for being such notorious high school students. Yes people, A is no longer the SMART section. PFT, pathetic.

***

God, you know what kills me? Seeing my friends fall. And not fall literally, not fall in love; fall in life. Fall in a black hole where every dream, every inspiration, every aspiration, every feeling disappears. You feel nothing but numbness.

To me, you are nothing but a mere memory. A memory that has caused me, and all of your friends PAIN. Study it, Learn it, and accept it. You'll feel it sooner or later.

ciao!

you know what? I had the most fun conversation with gine, lisa, gold, and mayte :D We are all so...GAGO. haha, pero fuck, it serves her right! (whoever she is). We just wanna say fuck you, bitch. That comes form our hearts. Don't you just adore us? To hell with you.

Do you know what's currently bugging me? Lies, Posing, Plagiarism, Back Stabbing, Bitches, and Low-Life's

Pretty harsh? Hell no.

Have you ever felt betrayal? Like someone you really care about has shattered your heart? As if they played with it and made it putty on their hands? It hurts like hell, right?

This is a sad, sad story. But, as cliche` as it sounds, The truth hurts.

I just want inflict pain, with a great amount of force, to the people who no longer have respect to other people. Have you no shame? Are you so low that you have to turn your friends against each other? Are you that DENSE That you did not realize that sooner or later the people you have hurt will find out EVERYTHING there is to know about you? You must think we are all Idiots. Thin again, who's the Idiot now?

Sad to say but the Ignorance of people is caused by the Low-ness and Pathetic-ness of the people's minds. It is not their fault that they were given such puny brains. It is also not their fault that they have absolutely no tact. I, myself, think that we should not hate them; we should pity them. We should pity the fact that they know nothing but gossip. That they were sent out on such pathetic quests, and those quests are to, as much as possible, try to destroy the happiness that the better person or people deserve. That, that is their goal on life.

Hence, I pity them. Don't worry, I'll pray for you. I'll '' pray for your "so-called tortured soul" . I just hope that you learn from this. You learn to consider the feelings of the people around you.

LESSON LEARNED:

1. Things don't always go as you planned.
2. Lying is one thing - betrayal is another.
3. Sometimes, the on you most trust ends up causing you pain - and sometimes the person you least expect will be the best friend you never had.


/EDIT

A touching, moving poem from the beatiful show, Boston Public

I'm half asleep when I hear him coming
And I choose to stay asleep
I will myself while asleep to stay there
So I can dismiss the memory after
as nothing but a bad dream

I always hear the click
The click of a bedroomdoor being shut
can be deafening

And when he gets on top
he always touches my hair
like he did when I was little
when he'd read to me

Sometimes when he'd read
he'd changed the story and add something silly
I'd laugh: 'Daddy no.'

Now when he comes in at night
After my mother is sleeping
And he changes the story for ever
I just cry to myself: 'Daddy no.'

*NOTE: There are a lot of errors in this copy cause I just got it from a message board in some foreign country where he/she just translated it to english.

//EDIT

Bonjour. Ciao.

I didn't go to school today for NO reason at all :D Happy happy joy joy!

The Ateneo lost to La Salle AGAIN! WTF IS HAPPENING?! Ok lang, sabi ni dad mas matalino daw yun mga Atenista's at bob0 daw mga lasallista. tangina. phuck. AND AN LAKI NG GWINAPO NG MGA ATENISTAS COMPARED SA LASALLISTA. tscht, im just pissed. I mean the Ateneo did ok the first 2 quarters, but what the hell happened?

SCORE:

1st quarter 13 - 13 TIE ALL.
2nd quarter 28-30 DLSU leading
3rd quarter 35-49 DLSU leading
4th quarter 55-69 DLSU leading

DLSU won overall. PFT, this is so annoying. I despise DLSU and loathe Mac Cardona he sucks. And for the record, he looks like a horse; unlike the Atenistas who look so hott even more when they're sweaty!

I Love Franz
by MacMac Cardona

Once upon a time, back in Carson,
a man approached me for a reason.
"I like your game," I heard him say,
"Play for us and you'll get paid."

So I asked the guy: "Yo, from where you be?"
He said: "De LaSalle University."
He told me 'bout the Green Archers,
The car, the condo and all the perks.

What about eligibility?
My playing years have been more than 3.
"It doesn't matter if you've played ball for 9,"
He said, "We'll fix your papers, you'll be just fine."

So I suited up for the Green & White,
Animo LaSalle! Fight! Fight! Fight!
When I gave them a taste of my baby hook,
The UAAP board took a second look.

Oh shit! What the fcuk! It's Montinola!
"Relax," Coach whispered, "inayos ko na."
"Tell me coach, will they stop me?"
"Not if you've played for just 2.3!"

Thanks to coach, I'm still here...
Although living in constant fear.
So we finished the season on top of the game,
We lied, we cheated...ain't no shame.

Now I'm just waiting to play ball next season.
Why do I love coach? Do you want a reason?
I LOVE FRANZ 'COZ HE LOVES ME!
Ok now, so where's my money?

Thank you.

-FEELER.*got this from gine muchos gracias señorita (:

Arrivederci. Au revoir. Adiós. Sayonara. (:

We had our PTC today. I did good enough :D

Aww, I was late for training so I had to endure 60 squat thrusts PLUS we didn't have a lecture so it was straight to drills! My body hurts so phucking bad. Oh well, Mudra and Allyson picked up my report card and I don't know what the hell my adviser told them.

Moving on, I had a date with my friend, Maryrose. We had a movie date :D haha! We watched 13 going on 3o and *sigh* Mark Ruffalo was just so charming and sweet in that movie. We watched after we PIGGED out at Mikki d's in Greenhills [that place is swarming with Montessorians! Obviously ;p] After that, we went to Galle to meet up with Maria's boyfriend, Eric and his buddies Kc and Vivo *waves!* [message to them: hey dudes! 'wsup? :D] nyahahah. Guess who we saw at Galle? Chuck, Carla O., Amrit, etc... MORE MONTESSORIANS! tscht. Tambay ng Montessorians Galle and GH :D aww, too bad though! No more students stay at steak-joint they're all at Dencio's bagong smoking place ng students :D

CONCERT: ugh annoying. I stayed for awhile but I went home FAST! I couldn't endure the pain my body was currently experiencing at the moment so I headed to Maria's place. We again Pigged-Out. Tita Wendy and Jhim dropped by. Maria did her surveys while me and Richard talked about how much we hated "Ittsumo" and the group who performed it. We also enjoyed insulting the stupid music video. Haha, we probably sounded so annoying immitating the annoying voices of the performers ;p

Anyways, I'm sleepy, I'm tired, I'm wasted, so I'm out!ö

PHUCK. P.T.C. tomorrow :/ Scary Shit. God damn it... pray for me?

Aww, I don't know where to go...Anton's birthday party or the Rockista Concert at Ultra tomorrow after training [I could only go though if I get good grades] tangina, I wish I could go to both. tscht.

PHUCK I gtg...

Screw the world.

Whats is up with people these days? How can they take being fake to people and theirselves?

These are the things that happen to people when you don't like the same things anymore, when you don't have the same interests, and when you don't hang out with the same crowd.

She is the most inconspicuous girl on their batch while the other is the most pupular girl on their batch; She's a hopeless-romantic and the other is the batch-playgirl; She's an introvert and the other is an extrovert; She doesn't care about what people think and the other lives for the opinions and judgement of others on her. She gives out her opinions and the other just plagiarises her.

PLAGIARISM tore these 2 EX-bestfriends apart...

ring a bell?

Yup, "SHE"is myself and "The Other" was my bestfriend...

Amazing really, It wasn't until I found out she was reading my blog that i finally had the guts to accept our differences...That i had finally accepted she had done nothing but lie to me and to others... I pity you. You know who you are... I CAN'T believe it. TSCHT. friends? bestfriends? GOD, am I dense.

TO YOU:

Dear "friend",

Do you seriously think I dont see your lies? Your posing? Your plagiarising? GOD, you must think I'm super dense. I wonder how your new bestfriend is doing? Well, just so you know, We both wasted 7 years of friendship. We were bestfriends for 7 PHUCKING YEARS. Doesn't that mean anything? goddamnit. How can you betray my trust? HOW CAN YOU PLAGIARISE ME? I mean come on, you're better than me at EVERYTHING, isn't that enough? do you have to claim my HARD work as yours? tscht...thank god i have kit.

I've got nothing more to say to you.

I do hope you get to read that. Let me elaborate. THIS WHOLE POST IS DEDICATED TO YOU.

**

/EDIT ateneo lost to lasalle. vudtryp.//EDIT

Sunday: i treated ate blu, kuya jc, ate jae, and myself to a movie and dinner :D We watched dodgeball shit, ganda! haha ;p Reminds me of Zoolander so yun, it was fun (: We watched in Shang.

Monday: Went to school and had a LONG quiz in Math. lintek, i forgot my math quiz notebook. PFT, pathetic. Ok lang, sisiw parin (: Shit, grabe *hayy* yell im so sorry :(

I gtg, my phucking brother is gonna use the pc :D

lub yu boi.

cocc training was fun :D i got there late cause i had to go see my Optomologist *grin* haha. We started training with rifles (owyeh, ambigat!)

tangina, ust ginaya ateneo...cheers and dances and everything. ay, lintek. VUDTRYP. pft, rip-off.

ay, crush ko si *** ******* :D an gwapo *drool* haha. tama tama. id give you a hint...his birthday is on SEPTEMBER * (:

Maria was caught cheating. lintek. tsktsk. vud hyun. i think she's gon get suspended from cocc. PLUS, her priorities aren't that straight; she prefers dance club rather than cocc. er, iono... im gonna be honest though... Angelic and I think and hope that Maria will be suspended... Atlestthen the rest of us will have a chance...She should actually be flattered! that was a compliment on her part.. It's just like saying she excels in everything she wants and tries to do. UGH, OK. I hate saying and admitting that. :D

Charlie (charles! uy, charlie charlie charlie :D haha, that's what Miguel and I call charles) and Sir Go (Jan) were absent today and yesterday... Thay have this family outing (PASALUBONG! :D) so they didn't get to go to school...I think it was in Samar (they had to go by boat and plane :D) SWERTE! yafoos. haha. can't wait to meet their eldest brother ;p gwapo din daw eh! The 3 go's: Charles Rico, Jan Ernest, and Jan/John (not sure..) Christian. *HOTTMEN* lol ;p Ok lang yan Migs! Your hott din (:

Im excited :D We're already arranging the date and time of when we are gonna get fitted for our Alpha uniforms :D *HURRAH!* im frigginexcited :D FUDGE. Sabi ni maam bunsoy na kung na talo daw kami sa IPC lahat nang bumagsak nun removal exam tatanggalin. FUCCCCCK. scared :/ pray for me? (:

shit. PTC on the 18th. arghargh. Im not allowed to go to anton's bday party if i dont pass. scary shit. and pinalitan na yun theme and venue... casual nalang ;p


Class picture was taken thursday :/ haha, am pangit ;p ok lang, an daming candid shots and group pics. I'll post them when i get my copies :D

Im off to watch the admu-feu game :D GO ATENEO!

i am the ateneo fan :D

speaking of which, ate jae knows chris tiu! FUCK. lintek na connections..he's so *faint* haha ;p

leyter.


/EDIT
tangina...the ateneo lost to feu. PAKSHIT. 65-51. hmpft. tangina... bad trip. haaay nako. SAYANG. owell, atleast we get to fight the archers. one big fight? tangina...one big nose si cardona eh. pft. yafoo. //EDIT

I just got up literally and its 6:38p. haha. lazyass. pft, I do have an explanation though. I slept at 4a last night and i completely forgot about having cocc training. After 2 hours of sleep ate jae woke me up and asked if i was gon go with her and attend training. HOLY CRAP, i thought. So i had to attend. We stayed to do drills on the quad but we also had a lecture with mr.capistrano about "Introduction" from guy to girl, guy to guy and so on... Also about hugging, kisasing, and "OTHERS" hahah. Mr. Capistrano told us how to act and how to send signals and shit like that. Everyone was laughing their heads off! Since we were in the same classroom as another company so the 4th year likewise were laughing hard.

Anyways, i forgot to get my algebra book on my locker. argh.

**

Anton's having his party at sept.18 pr 19 i think. :D HAWAIIAN THEME! putek, pinagbibihis kami ni maria ng hawaiian clothes! yun hawaiian skirt daw...tas water balloon fights. lintek. sabi namin ni bes ayaw namin tas sabi ni ton "wag na kayo mahiya! sexy naman kayo eh" tas binatukan namin sha. haha. ay baka di ako pumunta! galit ako kay ton ngayun eh..may ginawa sha *raise eyebrow*

Ateneo lost to UP. pft

74-69

lintek.

No school tomorrow :D God must be happy! HALLELUJAH!

BTW, my new favorite poems :D

INVUCTUS
by: William Ernest Henley

Out of the night that covers me,
Black as the pit from pole to pole,
I thank whatever gods may be
For my unconquerable soul.

In the fell clutch of circumstance
I have not winced nor cried aloud.
Under the bludgeonings of chance
My head is bloody, but unbowed.

Beyond this place of wrath and tears
Looms but the Horror of the shade,
And yet the menace of the years
Finds, and shall find, me unafraid.

It matters not how strait the gate,
How charged with punishments the scroll,
I am the master of my fate:
I am the captain of my soul.

Shiit. ganda. haha, sabi nila bagay daw sakin. ala tortured soul :D

Ito naman..song stuck on my head

I dont wanna be-Gavin DeGraw

I don't need to be anything other than a prison guard's son
I don't need to be anything other than a specialist's son
I don't have to be anyone other than a birth of two souls in one
Part of where I'm going is knowing where I'm coming from

I don't want to be anything other than what I've been trying to be lately
All I have to do is think of me and I have peace of mind
I'm tired of looking 'round rooms wondering what I gotta do
Or who I'm supposed to be
I don't want to be anything other than me

I'm surrounded by liars everywhere I turn
I'm surrounded by imposters everywhere I turn
I'm surrounded by a deadly crisis everywhere I turn
Am I the only one to notice?
I can't be the only one who's learned

I don't want to be anything other than what I've been trying to be lately
All I have to do is think about me and I have peace of mind
I'm tired of looking 'round rooms wondering what I gotta do
Or who I'm supposed to be
I don't want to be anything other than me

Can I have everyone's attention please
See, not like this and that
You're gonna have to leave
I came from the mountain, the crust of creation
My whole situation made from clay, dust, stone
And now I'm telling everybody

I don't want to be anything other than what I've been trying to be lately
All I have to do is think of me and I have peace of mind
I'm tired of looking 'round rooms wondering what I'm trying to do
Or who I'm supposed to be
I don't want to be anything other than me
I don't want to be
I don't want to be
I don't want to be
I don't want to be

Nice ;p